Cross Country.

Today was cross country and I came 21st out of 38!!!! I'm actually very proud of myself because I couldn't breath when I did it. I've had a cold recently that won't go away about today I just couldn't breathe at all. last year I came 19th, I guess 21st's still good but I've go down in progression.

In the changing rooms I threw up in the bathroom and almost fainted. All the girls know in my year because a girl named Jessica Fulleton knew and shouted it out to everyone. A few of the boys found out within seconds, which means it's only a matter of time before Lukas finds out.
And when he does I'm gunna bloody shit myself. Lukas is very protective and caring towards me and if I am hurt in any way, he goes crazy with worry. I don't want him to worry about me, so I've asked my friends to say that it's just a rhoumor. Lizzie (who calmed down and we are back on track) offered to say that it was actually her throwing up in the bathroom.

I'm not going to school tomorrow though because me forcing myself to do cross country in gale force winds at  70mph  with my cold has worsened my condition and I feel shit again.... yay! Not.

I want to go to school tomorrow. This may sound completely stupid but I only want to go to school to see Lukas. That means I'm in love with him right? I'm not sure anymore my friends say it's just "first love" and apparently that it stays with you forever. I'm pretty sure that "first love" could make me feel this way towards Lukas. I love him..... I guess I will always love him.
I know I say that pratically every post, but it's true and this blog page was made so I could vent my feelings. Like a diary, though my diary has darker secrets than this blog and no I'm not going to post any.

Well that's all from me today,
Love,
Phillippa
xxx
P.S Oh!!! I almost forgot, I've got a new little foster brother and he threatened me and now his sister whom I've never met says that she's going to "batter me" because apparently he wouldn't have threatened me unless I did something to him..... I just refused to let him in my room..... SOMEONE CALL THE POLICE!!! (I say very sarcastically) So anyway, she wants to kill me.

I guess threatening people for no apparent reason runs in their family. :/